Fat Projections

This was from the January 24 incarnation, but you can see all at the website: http://livingpictureprojects.com/

And a skip through time lands me…

I now live with Janie Martinez, who is featured in one of the below segments and appears in my film. The film, which was never released, was a successful thesis presentation. If I had more resources at my disposal, I would love to finish it for a future distribution. My cut is long and preachy. Too much talking. I know FCP, but I need an editor who didn’t marry the material.

Anyway, I’m quite happy here. I’m one of three roommates in a wonderful apartment in TriBeCa.

I return to Tumblr today because I’m applying for a job that uses Social Media, and I realize that I haven’t really kept up with my use of it. I’ve dabbled in twitter and indulge in facebook. I get curious over Apps like Grindr and 4Square, but my involvement always seems to wax and wane.

I’ve been busy these last 6 months as I made the transition to life in New York. There’s been dance classes, performance art, and temp jobs. I went to a Marilyn Wann lecture at Sarah Lawrence! And I’ve been making friends. In the coming months I’ll be choreographing for one friend’s show!

Prior to NYC, I had been living in my hometown of Charleston, WV, where I returned after graduation and philandering in China. I knew that I needed more for 2011, so I ventured up here through the snow. Soon my WV boy and poodle are moving up to share this sweet existence.

I hope that I continue to post to this Tumblr and keep it as a journal for my size politiking and forays into art.

» More resources.

Today I stumbled upon this site is “an oral, visual and written history project which seeks to be a humanizing force in body image activism. By collecting and sharing the many and varied stories of individuals of size, the Fat Experience Project® seeks to engage with, educate, empower and enrich the lives of people of size, our allies […]”

The site links to 1) ‘Size Qeen,’ an online clothing store and 2) a gallery of positive body images called ‘Bellies are Beautiful’.

I’m happy to make these discoveries.

Now that I’m starting to see the vast array of resources, I need to think about how I will differentiate my exploration of the body and this culture from these other efforts. While my exhibition space will highlight the materiality of embodiment, I think I also need to engage how the embodied experiences changes with size and size-acceptance.

Here I can tie in questions about thinspo to the questions I ask about reactions to portrayals in the media. I think I may even need to interview one of these ‘thinspo’ authors, because they identify fat on their bodies; and they can talk about their cultural-online formation around their bodies in ways that engage a basic question: how do people pursue visibility for their bodies and their bodies’ ideals.

“ Emily Rems on Fat Girl Flea Market: “This event is so freakin’ awesome because thrift shopping is usually a fruitless farce if you wear above a size 12. But once a year, this fundraiser for NOLOSE collects second-hand donations from the closets of big girls all over the city, and then sells ‘em off wikkid cheap in a melee of plus-size bargain madness. Its only been going on for three years, but each year the event gets bigger and bigger, drawing crowds from all over. This year, I finally got my act together and filled a whole garbage bag full of stuff to donate. I was carrying it across the intersection of 14th and 6th when a gang of fat ladies from BOSTON literally chased me down the street and surrounded me in front of Grey’s Papaya.

— emilyrems.com

This is the game that I remember playing as a kid. The picture was taken by someone and posted on flicker. The comments and responses are worth looking at.

Tumblr is so much fun, when you learn how to work it!

» This is tragic. Thinspo sucks.

I didn’t want to do this, because it’s just a little to sick. But I know that many don’t know or haven’t see any pro-Ana websites.

This one took me less than a minute to find. I just searched “thinspo” on google images and the fourth or so image was posted from this person’s Xanga.

I purposefully didn’t embed any thinspo as an image. As they say.. beware the jump, mind the gap… click on the link if you can stomach (absolutely no pun intended) this.

So I linked this with Janie Martinez below, but after learning a little more about how to navigate this site, I realized I could embed it here!

» Vassar MEDS Seminar

This links to the main seminar page where you can find links to other students’ pages.

Sad little live-journal

So, looking at my compatriots’ tumblrs, I realize that I’ve been doing a little bit more of a live-journal thing.

I swear I never had one of these things, so I’m not sure why I’m falling into that format; but since it’s here, I’m going to utilize it.

Thinking about live-journals, I’m reminded of pro-ana personal websites. There are so many of. They post tragic images of emaciated women to inspire stricter adherence to dieting. It’s called “thinspo.”

Doing a live journal about my explorations of what body means sort of fits alongside this approach.

I’m not really setting out to make ‘fatspo.’ I’m not trying to influence any one’s eating habits. Primarily my project is just to show what’s going on. Of course my film is a statement; but I certainly don’t intend it to speak for anyone else.

I mean, it would be great if my final project inspires acceptance. I hope that by showing the vibrancy of fat subculture to people who haven’t come across it before I might be changing the world a little.

I’m also feeling much more interested in making a physical structure. Just looking at a screen doesn’t register the profound 3Dness of our bodies.

Okay, well that’s the post for today! Goodbye, my little live journal—full of self-indulgence and cliche.